That’s not PDA, you’re having sex.

An unidentified couple frolic in the open field known as the space between The Outpost and SSPA building. / Jack Chavdarian

Hands all over the buttocks, tongues down the throats, fingers in the hair and even a little dry humping every now and then. Have you ever passed by that couple on your way to class, and feel like you’re watching some kind of animal mating scene on the Discovery Channel?

At what point does public display of affection, otherwise known as PDA, turn into Kim Kardashian’s sex tape? When is enough, enough?

Environmental science major Eric Kim and child development graduate Jennifer Kim, of no blood relation, are a couple who just celebrated their 30-month anniversary. They don’t practice PDA, and they’re okay with that.

The love birds said PDA is okay, as long as it’s limited.

“Groping, making out, rolling around in the grass…I don’t want to see all that,” Eric said. “Get a room!”

His girlfriend Jennifer thinks a peck goodbye or holding hands is okay, but anything more is just unnecessary when out in public.

So what do the Cal State Long Beach rules have to say about this?

Under CSULB standards for students conduct it’s clearly stated that “Disorderly, lewd, indecent, or obscene behavior at a University related activity or directed toward a member of the University community” is “subject to disciplinary action.”

So when is it okay for me to call the security on a couple who are getting too heavy? Do I do it right away, or wait until after they have conceived a child?

I personally think when I feel the urge to vomit, you have crossed the line, ma’am/sir! Take that hand off that butt cheek, please! If I wanted to see it, I would search for it online like what any normal person would do.

According to Jack, this is an example of acceptable PDA. / Jack Chavdarian

A quick kiss is okay, a hug is a beautiful thing, holding hands is even fine, but that better be all you’re holding, is all I’m saying