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MGTOW’s toxic masculinity comes from pain

Incels, MGTOW and other male supremacist groups are rooted in the hatred of women.

I never imagined that watching YouTube videos criticizing feminism and belittling women would challenge my ideologies, but that is exactly what happened. 

“Men Going Their Own Way” is a philosophy followed by men who believe all women are sluts, cheaters, gold diggers and worth nothing after the age of 30. 

Imagine the shock and horror I experienced as a 17-year-old girl listening to grown men tell me how horrible and useless my gender was to them. 

I disagree with the majority of what is said about women on MGTOW internet forums. Their generalizations are not true for every woman. However, I understand where these men are coming from, as my father went through similar experiences. 

These men warn each other to stop engaging in relationships with women. They do not have children, cohabitate or spend their resources on women. MGTOW believe all women are hypergamous, entitled, narcissistic, selfish and incapable of loving others. 

Most men in the United States do not exhibit traits of toxic masculinity, but a growing following of men explicitly discuss their hatred for women and feminism. 

So, when companies like Gillette make advertisements about “toxic masculinity” who are they speaking to? Some men see campaigns like this as an attempt to demonize innocent men. 

This past summer, I worked up the courage to publish a video on my YouTube channel sympathizing with the MGTOW community, but also addressing two things I disagreed with them on. 

I was sexually harassed and cyberbullied in the comment section by hundreds of these men for about two weeks straight. I only had 78 subscribers, but well-known MGTOW channels were making videos about me. 

[aesop_image img=”http://lbcurrent.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/09/Screen-Shot-2019-09-11-at-3.04.56-PM.png” panorama=”off” align=”center” lightbox=”on” captionsrc=”custom” caption=”Some of the comments from MGTOW denigrating women and Rowden on her video.” captionposition=”left” revealfx=”off” overlay_revealfx=”off”]

It was a depressing time for me. I came from a place of love and understanding, but instead I was called a whore and racist names. A lot of MGTOWs called me fat and ugly. Everything I hated about my body was reaffirmed by them. 

I cried about it for a few days because it was the only thing I could do. 

Toxic masculinity does exist, but the MGTOW community does not represent the majority of men and not all MGTOWs hate women. They simply refuse to take the risk to commit to women. 

Their hate was unwarranted, but I forgive MGTOWs because they are hurt individuals who are dealing with their pain in unconventional ways. They have been used and abused by women. I was just an easy target. 

This does not justify their actions, but at least we can try to understand why they are like this instead of calling them a hate group and dismissing what they say.

Men who feel isolated from society flock to the internet because it is their only option for a male space. These men do not feel comfortable discussing their issues in public because nobody cares. 

It is important to understand the correlation between MGTOW’s expansion and the increasingly radical nature of modern feminism. I am not saying either side is right, but it is a chain reaction. 

Men do not just forfeit sex for no good reason. If feminism is equality for men and women, then we need to start to talk about men’s issues too.

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10 Comments

  1. Thanks for the empathetic take. It does come from a place of pain. I’m hoping the movement comes to a more positive conclusion than where it currently is.

    1. I add my thanks, Ms. Rowden. Your willingness to admit that men’s issues need to be seriously considered and discussed, not trivialized and dismissed out of hand, your willingness to see the vitriol with which you were met within the context of anger generated by misuse and abuse of men by women, and even your willingness to a knowledge the existence of extremist and radical militant feminism (not to be confused with more moderate and reasonable “equality of opportunities and equal pay for equal work” focused feminism), speaks well of you.

      Stand tough, dear lady. If you continue to be balanced and reasonable, you will prevail.

  2. Thank you for this work, at least you tried. I will never commit again to any woman.

  3. All you just did to was to successfully argue the case of MGTOW and redpill men. You said you were called a whore and racist names; where is the pictorial evidence? You had all the time in the tworld o take and put up a picture where i see men just saying they want to be left alone.

    By the way, painting yourself as a victim or the person with the moral high ground did not work. That’s exactly what MGTOW try to expose: your need to manipulate the narrative whilst still being the oppressor.

  4. Absolutely no idea what you are talking about. I’ve seen red pill and MGTOW stuff proven to me on a daily basis, especially in mainstream society. It has helped me dodge all kinds of problems with women and relationships.

    Also, 49ers is pretty amusing, as it’s red pill slang, it’s a 4 that thinks she’s a 9.

    1. It is also a gold digger, a woman who looks at men as nothing more than a pile of resources to be plundered at will.

  5. Mgtow is wisdom and freedom for men.. the future for this generation of women is wine, ice cream, cats and dildos.

  6. cry in your cups for all you want, but MEN ARE GOING AWAY ANYWAYS, The juice is not worth the Squeeze for THEM.
    Now you can try to Virtue-Signal about what kind of a benign, rumi-eyed kinda delicate little flower women are that need to be protected and nurtured, but the reality is THEY ARE NOT.
    And we all know why women are rattled by this philosophy. Because women cannot DILUTE IT. That’s why. I am looking forward from a response from ya

  7. Mgtow is right. Modern woman have no constraints to their hypergamy and are dangerous to any man foolish enough to test the waters. I have two male family members who can attest.

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