Beach? What beach?
Certainly the article about beach encroachment in Thursday’s Long Beach Press-Telegram couldn’t have been talking about somebody setting up his or her summer vacation home on Friendship Walk at Cal State Long Beach. They couldn’t be writing about that yet because we haven’t begun construction.
Ahh, they must have written about our city beach being stolen by well-heeled citizens, who build patios, walls, gardens and sun decks to block access on the Peninsula. That would be near criminal.
After all, that is public property and nobody could be as arrogant as former city councilman Frank Colonna by homesteading without our permission. The article claims that not only are there 31 property owners ripping off our land, but two other landowners may have illegally extended their boundaries.
There’s now a probe by the California Coastal Commission in the pipeline. Assistant City Attorney Mike Mais is mulling the possibility of joining forces with the Coastal Commission to start clearing these varmints off the sand so the rest of us don’t have to circumnavigate illegal structures to get to “our” beach.
When, and if, the city and commission decide to evict these trespassers, it will give new meaning to beach cleanup.
Speaking of beach cleanups (while we’re raiding the Press-Telegram’s pages), the city once again displayed itself as a model of efficiency by spilling 5,400 gallons of raw sewage near Marine Stadium and Mother’s Beach.
The spill apparently happened when the Long Beach Water Department was clearing roots near a sewage line. It’s never a great idea to swim with your mouth open in Long Beach as it is, what with the report card they received during the summer.
We are already deserving of the dubious designation as the worst beaches in the state, and we don’t even have a real beach. As our public relations contribution, we do own the reputation of being a lovely storage receptacle for toxic sludge.
The good folks on the Peninsula (our one-time councilman included) have historically blocked any attempt to bring waves back to the shore by removing the breakwater. They have this paranoia thingy about the ocean reclaiming the shoreline, much like they fear the city and Coastal Commission doing the same.
Perhaps we can get the water department crew to take their mega weed whacker over to the Peninsula and clear the land those entitlement squatters are perched on. While they’re at it, maybe the demo squad can get rid of the funky ice plant forest, too.
Call in a Navy Seal demolition team, set a few charges next to the breakwater, let the ocean do its bio-remediation gig and we might be able to justify calling the city Long Beach, rather than the clichéd “Wrong Beach.”
Believe it or not, there once was a time, many eons ago, when waves crashed against our shore and people were able to enjoy fun in the sun.
Today, though, the only place that’s reasonably healthy near the coast is our wave-free university.
Heck, we don’t even have a tanning salon. It almost makes us want to scream G(N)o Beach! (The “G” is silent.)
