As every semester ends, I try to plan my schedule around classes for the next semester. I stress needlessly about the amount of time to leave between classes to grab lunch or the location of each class in relation to the next. But now, as I prepare to graduate, this seemingly endless cycle of pointless repetition is finally finding meaning.
I never thought that it would take me seven years to graduate or that I would feel as confident about myself as I do now, but things change in college, especially when you have people behind you.
When I started school at El Camino College, things seemed easy. I thought I could coast through, get my degree in music, and go off to make millions of dollars. Of course, this is a common thought among young people fresh out of high school, especially if your high school career went well, as mine did. What an idiot I was.
After high school, I had a lot going for me. I was in a band with my best friend, had a good home life and steady grades at my new college. But it didn’t last. My insecurity got the better of me because I wasn’t used to being alone so often with my thoughts. I took people’s comments about my looks and weight too seriously and stopped believing in myself.
Nothing was good enough.
But thanks to my father and his common-sense strategy of telling me that quitting school would be harder than finishing, I was convinced that my own immaturity needed to be dealt with and quitting was not the answer.
After I transferred to Cal State Long Beach five years into my education, I felt a new surge of energy. Classes moved by faster, meeting people was easier and I finally gained confidence, but not on my own. I met a girl. I’m still with her today.
As I started getting more involved, I made sure that my balance remained stable. One of the most common things I noticed within myself was either too much or not enough confidence at times. Basically, it was “Spider-Man 2” followed by “Spider-Man 3” levels of conflict. But I paid attention to my problem and got over it.
Money was a problem early on until my dad retired and told me he didn’t want me to suffer like he did with college. I could have taken the high road and said no to his offer, but college is tough and I needed to be focused on more than a part-time job.
The point of this story is that no matter how long it takes you to get through college, you shouldn’t let it get to you. There were numerous times I wanted to quit but kept going because I knew that I had passed the point of no return. Finding out who I was as a person was more important than finishing my degree in a hurry.
As I finish with college, I think back to the friends who helped me become ready for the world. These friends aren’t even friends anymore, but merely single-serving entities in classes that only lasted for brief moments throughout my college career. But whoever helped me, wherever you are, thanks.
Ted Goslin is a graduating senior journalism major and assistant city editor for the Daily Forty-Niner.
