For my frat boy “I can drink 10 beers and not get drunk” friends, they have the Super Bowl.
For my intellectual “I’m too smart to like American sports” friends, they have the World Cup.
But for me, and my dorky “I can’t get a girlfriend if my life depended on it” friends, we have Election Day.
Oh, Election Day. After months and months of watching the Donkeys and Elephants insult each other day after day, finally today the players (aka the voters) will hit the field as they go to polling places around the United States.
In no other sport are the stakes so high.
When a team wins a championship in a “traditional sport,” it is nice for a couple of days for the winning teams’ fans, but eventually the people go back to their everyday routine.
Election Day is different. Whoever wins has the power to change the world. Not even a Super Bowl ring can do that.
Just think what would have happened if Al Gore received a thousand more points (aka votes) in Florida on Election Day 2000.
Saddam Hussein would be living in a palace instead of being on death row, we would all be driving environmentally friendly automobiles and Tony Snow would still be a talking head on Fox News.
Another reason why Election Day is the best sporting event is because it has the best sportscasters.
Football might have John Madden, but politics has Tim Russert.
Russert, with his miniature white board and magic marker, is a joy to watch on Election Day. At some point tonight he is going to say, “It all comes down to this: If the Democrats can pull of the upset in Tennessee and hold on in Missouri, then they will overtake the Republicans in the Senate.”
Russert makes Election Day sound like a Big Ten college basketball rivalry, which leads me into my next point: No other sporting event has so many games on one day.
Tonight, there is going to be 435 congressional games, 36 gubernatorial games and 33 Senate games. Why is it great to have so many games in one day? Because you have so many things to bet on!
On the Web site for the Washington Post, you can click on “Midterm Madness” and just like for “March Madness,” you can predict the winners in tonight’s matchups. (Note: My upset special is Jim Pederson over Jon Kyl for the Arizona Senate championship.)
So tonight, as election workers tally up the points, I will be slightly intoxicated and screaming my team on, hoping to inspire them to victory.
Are you ready to rumble?
Patrick Creaven is a senior journalism major and the sports editor for the Daily Forty-Niner.
You can follow the Election Day results with our Sports Editor Patrick Creaven on his blog, at daily49ersports.blogspot.com.