With technology doing everything our minds can imagine, why not let it helps us find a soul mate? Technology allows you to make a dating selection in the privacy of your home and “take your time to read about someone, get to know them by email and phone before you get out.”
It makes total sense, but it’s not as easy as it seems and it does require you to put in effort. Like the saying goes, “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.” Sites are set up to help you find that special person, but it can only do so much.
If your profile isn’t cracking it may be time to change it up a bit. But don’t do it because you feel like you have to update it all the time – it’s not Facebook. Besides, if you do it right the first time there might not be a need to change it again. The key is to represent yourself and how unique you are, so stay away from generic introductions like “I am…” and “I am looking for…”
Also, make sure your picture is current and don’t feel the need to explain every bad aspect of yourself because if you are really trying to sell yourself it’s going to make the other person run away.
I am not condoning lying, but author and founder of online dating consulting firm E-Cyrano, Evan Marc Katz, points out that there are parts of yourself that the other person should only get to know once they have met you.
The next tip is for women in particular. In order to keep your expectations reasonable it is best to assume that your date makes 20 percent less than what he says and is two inches shorter, according to clinical psychologist at Western Carolina University, Dr. David McCord. The reality is that men and women equate height with attractiveness and money is sexy too.
As far as pictures go, women should flirt with the camera and show their biggest smiles as if they were looking at that perfect guy. It’s an inviting look and, according to studies, it will bring about an average of 1.5 more visits a month to your profile page.
On the other hand, women prefer mystery and less smiling because, according to McCord, it can be seen as submissiveness.
Besides, studies show that “men of higher status tend to smile less.” Although, smiling in person will help you appear kinder once you’ve met her will be better than being mysterious.
Finally, women will only find men showing off their abs in pictures attractive while the guy is still young. In an older man, it suggests a level of narcissism and, frankly, the older a woman gets the more interested she is in his wallet and not his body.
That being said, women should be smart about showing off their décolletage, as they get older. The study shows that a woman’s “mate value” decreases with age, meaning showing off physical attributes in a flattering way increases a woman’s chances of finding a mate and compensates for her age. Don’t show too much or you might be setting yourself up for being seen as promiscuous.
If online dating is your thing, keep these tips from the experts in mind when creating your profile and you will be well on your way to finding a great person to date.
Nayeli Carillo is a senior journalism major and a contributing writer for the Daily 49er.
